Yesterday, a student of mine's father arrived to collect her things from her locker and withdraw her from our school district. She'd been in our school, our district... no, our country for only a few months, and now she is leaving.
She didn't leave because of anything good, but she didn't do anything bad. She didn't leave because her parents needed to relocate due to a job opportunity. In fact, she's leaving the country while her dad stays here to continue to provide for her and the rest of her family back in Mexico. She did nothing wrong, but she is getting the consequences of somebody else's negative actions.
I'll backtrack a little bit.
Two weeks ago, this student came to my classroom and handed me a note she had just found in her locker. It was a letter addressed to her personally. In it, she was referred to in an extremely derogatory manner multiple times. The writer, clearly another student, commented negatively on the clothing bought for her by her hard-working father and finished off by threatening to end her life.
She was visibly shaken up by this demeaning and threatening note. Some colleagues and I immediately took action, notifying administrators and the SRO (school resource officer). Everyone was on top of it.
The student's father immediately came in. He respectfully expressed his concern and took his daughter home to console and protect her, demanding that we determine the culprit before he makes any decision to send her back to our school. Later that day, we saw that he had filed a police report concerning the incident. I'd have done the same for the safety of my own child.
Unfortunately, we were unable to see any indication of the letter's delivery on our school's cameras. We put our feelers out to trustworthy students and had them keep their ears perked and ask around to no avail. We became impromptu graphologists and analyzed writing samples from students who interacted with this girl on a regular basis or even rumored to have a beef with her. No leads have emerged from the investigation to date.
While we took care to reassure the student's father that she would certainly be safe with us in the building. He assured us that he trusted that fact. What he didn't trust was the wait at the bus stop in the mornings. He didn't trust the bus ride to and from school. He didn't trust the walk she would have to take from the bus stop to the neighbor's home where she stayed while he continued to work. He didn't trust the potential danger to his 10-year-old daughter outside of our four walls... and there was nothing we could say or do to instill that trust... and his genuine concern is justifiable.
Fast forward to now. The girl is leaving the country due to endangerment to her safety that she did not merit. This is a significant life change that she is undergoing due to a cowardly written note done in bad taste and most likely out of some juvenile reaction to jealousy and pain. I'm at a loss for what to do.
What can be done here? Today, I had a very short restorative circle with my students concerning her situation. I wish I had had more time to allow them to process and share their own feelings regarding the recent events. I gave one last request for anyone to step forward with any possible information that could be helpful.
I explained that this request wasn't just for their classmate's benefit, but also to help the student who wrote the note deal with anger and frustration in a more positive manner being that such harassing threats receive different consequences when they come from adults.
I'm reaching a somewhat distant conclusion that we as a district need some sort of school-neighborhood connection so students can feel safe anywhere within our boundaries. There is absolutely no reason that one student should be able to get away with threatening another denizen of our school's community, let alone make her feel unsafe to the point of avoiding interactions in her own neighborhood for fear of being injured by another person.
If we were to have some sort of grapevine that the local neighborhood is willing to communicate on, we could really bring people together and truly take a step towards actually acting as the village we need to be in order to "raise the child," so to speak.
Upon some preliminary research, I really like what I see going on in Chicago's LSNA (Logan Square Neighborhood Association). This non-profit organization has been around since 1962, so they have a sound track record. The LSNA seems to have a really comprehensive organization that involves giving the youth power to learn how to make a positive difference in their neighborhoods and schools when they feel a negative emotion in response to something happening around them.
I see the need here... but I see plenty of needs. What I seem to need is the help and accountability to actually follow through and do something about the problems I see around me. That's where I seem to drop the ball time after time. I'm not down about it though... just in contemplation... soul searching for the way I can be the change I wish to see in the world. Every failure is that step to success, isn't it?
She didn't leave because of anything good, but she didn't do anything bad. She didn't leave because her parents needed to relocate due to a job opportunity. In fact, she's leaving the country while her dad stays here to continue to provide for her and the rest of her family back in Mexico. She did nothing wrong, but she is getting the consequences of somebody else's negative actions.
I'll backtrack a little bit.
Two weeks ago, this student came to my classroom and handed me a note she had just found in her locker. It was a letter addressed to her personally. In it, she was referred to in an extremely derogatory manner multiple times. The writer, clearly another student, commented negatively on the clothing bought for her by her hard-working father and finished off by threatening to end her life.
She was visibly shaken up by this demeaning and threatening note. Some colleagues and I immediately took action, notifying administrators and the SRO (school resource officer). Everyone was on top of it.
The student's father immediately came in. He respectfully expressed his concern and took his daughter home to console and protect her, demanding that we determine the culprit before he makes any decision to send her back to our school. Later that day, we saw that he had filed a police report concerning the incident. I'd have done the same for the safety of my own child.
Unfortunately, we were unable to see any indication of the letter's delivery on our school's cameras. We put our feelers out to trustworthy students and had them keep their ears perked and ask around to no avail. We became impromptu graphologists and analyzed writing samples from students who interacted with this girl on a regular basis or even rumored to have a beef with her. No leads have emerged from the investigation to date.
While we took care to reassure the student's father that she would certainly be safe with us in the building. He assured us that he trusted that fact. What he didn't trust was the wait at the bus stop in the mornings. He didn't trust the bus ride to and from school. He didn't trust the walk she would have to take from the bus stop to the neighbor's home where she stayed while he continued to work. He didn't trust the potential danger to his 10-year-old daughter outside of our four walls... and there was nothing we could say or do to instill that trust... and his genuine concern is justifiable.
Fast forward to now. The girl is leaving the country due to endangerment to her safety that she did not merit. This is a significant life change that she is undergoing due to a cowardly written note done in bad taste and most likely out of some juvenile reaction to jealousy and pain. I'm at a loss for what to do.
What can be done here? Today, I had a very short restorative circle with my students concerning her situation. I wish I had had more time to allow them to process and share their own feelings regarding the recent events. I gave one last request for anyone to step forward with any possible information that could be helpful.
I explained that this request wasn't just for their classmate's benefit, but also to help the student who wrote the note deal with anger and frustration in a more positive manner being that such harassing threats receive different consequences when they come from adults.
I'm reaching a somewhat distant conclusion that we as a district need some sort of school-neighborhood connection so students can feel safe anywhere within our boundaries. There is absolutely no reason that one student should be able to get away with threatening another denizen of our school's community, let alone make her feel unsafe to the point of avoiding interactions in her own neighborhood for fear of being injured by another person.
If we were to have some sort of grapevine that the local neighborhood is willing to communicate on, we could really bring people together and truly take a step towards actually acting as the village we need to be in order to "raise the child," so to speak.
Upon some preliminary research, I really like what I see going on in Chicago's LSNA (Logan Square Neighborhood Association). This non-profit organization has been around since 1962, so they have a sound track record. The LSNA seems to have a really comprehensive organization that involves giving the youth power to learn how to make a positive difference in their neighborhoods and schools when they feel a negative emotion in response to something happening around them.
I see the need here... but I see plenty of needs. What I seem to need is the help and accountability to actually follow through and do something about the problems I see around me. That's where I seem to drop the ball time after time. I'm not down about it though... just in contemplation... soul searching for the way I can be the change I wish to see in the world. Every failure is that step to success, isn't it?
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